Home Latest Bigger isn’t always better: Legend of the collapsing ass

Bigger isn’t always better: Legend of the collapsing ass


It is no longer a well kept secret that most of our wcw with fantastic figures may have gone under the knife. While some may strut what their mamas gave them, others flaunt what Dr 90210 has given them. And the sudden turn of the ideal feminine figure from Kate Moss skinny, to Kim Kardashian thick is testament to the fickleness of trends.



When being anorexic thin was a fad, as is expected, women went above and beyond to stay thin, oftentimes taking it to the extreme, like starvation, anorexia, bulimia, drinking concoctions that promises to strip fat from their frames and leave them desirable bones.

Now with the new trend of being thick, women are going above and beyond to fulfill this effigy in desirability, by having massive backsides, corresponding large breasts and a non existent belly and waist. On a daily, companies are churning out cosmetic contrivances, that promises to give these fleshy mounds, awe inspiring volume. The production of teas and coffees that promises to be belly fat blasters and lets not forget the self punishing waist cinchers that have women fainting at the sheer torture of constricting the diaphragm into an impossible size, making the simple act of breathing difficult.

Many women, having doubts in the potency of belly blasting teas, torturous waist cinchers , booty and bum volumnizing potions have opted for the more permanent or semi permanent option of visiting a surgeon. And having their bodies surgically reconstructed. While I have no problem with a man or woman who would like to surgically improve their bodies which may have been left undesirably changed by childbirth, poor lifestyle choices, sickness or a just dissatisfaction with their natural figures. My gripe is founded in the comical shapes women are inflicting themselves with, in a bid not to be left behind by the slim thick nation.

We are not sure how long the trend of  ‘slim thick’ army will persist, but we are entertained by the ridiculousness by women to join the trend. Many have backsides so big and disproportionate to their frames that they have earned the nickname “ant booty”. Most women unable to afford proper surgeries are quick to patronize back door surgeons who all but inject unmentionables in their bums or breasts. These surgeries by backyard surgeons, look good after a while but will begin to deflate, leak and collapse. Which cause these women to get disfigured and in worst cases may lead to death.


By using back door surgeons, women not only put their bodies and life at risk but subject themselves to getting ridiculed. Imagine having a woman walk past you with a bum so solid that it has no natural gyration or sway, bums like these are derogatorily called ‘stone booty’, or ‘booty so hard and unshakable it is almost like making a fist’. The internet is filled with women who on a daily undergo extreme massages on their bums to give it softness and fluff. Failure to have these regular massages, is to have their buttocks solidify.

Another danger that patronizing backdoor surgeons pose, is the fact that these improperly surgically improved behinds collapses like a pack of cards. Have you ever seen a woman whose silhouette all but shows her bum, resting sadly almost to the back of her knees, giving off a botched appearance.


Ladies we have to stop! If you can’t love yourself, just the way you are, then save up money and visit a reputable surgeon who is board certified. Furthermore have the wherewithal to say no to piling up the volumes in the breasts and bum areas. I acknowledge that body dysmorphia is a reality, so people who go through this psychological problem should get psychological help and not attempt get more surgery in an attempt to fix this psychological issue.

Please save us, we the members of the general public the torment of having to feast our eyes on your collapsing ass.


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